i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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