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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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