im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
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Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
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Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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