He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize