nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
