What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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