Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
He told me they were just razor bumps!
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
