I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
