I've blown a few things in my day
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Randomize
