It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
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