dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Randomize
