Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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