Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Randomize
