I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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