Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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