its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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