did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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