i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
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How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
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Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.