Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
