Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
