ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
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