I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
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She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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