I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Randomize
