Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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