$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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