Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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