that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
