love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Porn is love you can see.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Randomize
