My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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