Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Remember the time you cried about coconuts