Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
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god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
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I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea