Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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