Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
