She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize