in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize