If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
