Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Randomize
