hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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