Plan B is the new Plan A
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize