dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
high people should be assigned attendants
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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