I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
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