Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Randomize
