based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
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No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
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as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
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