Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
We don't watch enough power rangers
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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