It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize