if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
