Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
