Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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