i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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