I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
