You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
